As I look into your eyes, I can see the confusion and hurt behind those beautiful brown eyes. You are laying on a cold, metal table, watching me cry as my heart is shattering into a million pieces.
I am holding your paw, as the vet is speaking to me, but I am not listening. The only thing racing through my mind is how in a few short minutes, my best friend will be gone forever.
Suddenly, 12 years doesn’t seem like enough time with you, and I am praying to rewind time and to give me back all of those years with you again.
As I sit there next to you, I begin reminiscing on every moment with you; the joys of exploring the world with you, the struggles of potty training and why you couldn’t just learn that the rug wasn’t grass, and all of the moments in between, where you laid your head on my chest as I experienced some of life’s heartaches. You never left my side, and were there for me through every joyous moment and every heartbreak.
As the vet injects you with the medicine to finally relieve you of your pain, I look into your eyes. You let out a tiny whimper as you take your last breath, and suddenly your eyes are closed and you are gone forever.
I throw my body on top of yours, weeping tears of sadness, as my insides feel gutted and empty.
I walk out of the vet clinic alone, with nothing more than your collar and name tag in my hands and puffy eyes filled with tears.
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For so many of us, this moment has been a reality far too many times. Our pets come into our lives, and experience some of the most joyous and beautiful moments with us, along with some of the most gut wrenching and heartbreaking moments too. They are there to comfort us through it all.
As today is Giving Tuesday, I wanted to honor those pets that have passed over the Rainbow Bridge, by sharing some tips for grieving and how to cope when your best furry friend passes away.
1. Give yourself time to heal
Pets come into our lives when it seems that we need them most. I still remember walking into Unleashed Pet Rescue and meeting Marlo for the first time. I held this tiny, five-week-old puppy in my hands, as she nuzzled her head under my neck. The warmth running through my body in that moment made me realize that she suddenly had me wrapped around her tiny paws, and I was not going to let her go.
Growing up, I also remember the time when our family dog, Colty, died after running into the street and getting struck by a car, and the sadness my little body felt in that moment. To lose a pet is one of the worst types of grief, and one that takes time to heal, so give yourself grace to work through all of the emotions coursing through your veins.
2. It is okay to keep a keepsake of them
Many people I know create a scrapbook of photos of their late dogs, while others have a keepsake drawer with old collars. Whatever you feel is most comfortable for you, do that. After all, this tiny little animal that resided in your home with you, is somehow your best friend, regardless of not being able to communicate verbally with them. It is okay to grieve them and hold onto their things in memory of them!
3. Do what is best for yourself
After the loss of a pet, everyone will be different with their grieving timeline, and that is okay! We all must do what is best for us. For some, that might be going to pick out another pet to help fill the gaping hole that they left within our hearts, while others need time to process the loss of their best friend, and simply could not imagine getting another pet yet. Everyone works on their own timeline, and every timeline is totally okay and normal! There is no right or wrong way to grieve the loss of your pet.
4. Your other pets are grieving too.
If you have other pets in the home, know that they are grieving the loss of your pet that passed away too. Lean on them in this time and seek comfort from them, as they will need your comfort as well. They do not understand why their best paw pal is no longer there to run around in the backyard with them, and they are confused why they suddenly aren’t home with you all. Some pets may sit there and wait for their furry friend to come and play, in hopes of them showing up out of the blue, but know that with time, healing for them will come as well.
5. Create a memorial of them
There are many ways to honor your late pet, and one of them can be to create a memorial for them. This can be done by having a photo of them hung up in your home to always remember them by, or it can be by taking their collar and name tag, and sending them off to an etsy store, for them to mold them together as a way for you to remember them by. Others might cremate their pet and have their ashes somewhere in their home, while some may choose to bury their pet and have a space set up in their backyard where they can visit them. Again, there is no right or wrong way to grieve a pet that has passed on. It is just important to do what feels right to you.
6. Honor them by donating to a pet in need
Another way that you can keep the memory of your pet alive is by donating to a shelter in need every year in memory of your pet. Sometimes it’s a monetary donation, while other times, it can be donating toys or blankets to help homeless animals. I cannot tell you the amount of times we had someone come into Unleashed Pet Rescue when I worked there and donated old items of their pet's to help out a pet in need. Sometimes, the thought of your pet doing some good by donating to a pet in need can bring comfort to you. If you need ideas on shelters to donate to, I have plenty of options for you!
7. Volunteer your time at a shelter
Lastly, sometimes getting out and volunteering your time with a shelter can help you cope with the loss of a pet. This can include taking dogs on a walk and spending some quality time with them. It can also include fostering a pet to give them a break from a shelter environment. Not only does this help the shelter pet socialize, but sometimes receiving love from a pet in need is exactly what you need to help you throughout your healing process.
Losing a pet is never easy, but I hope with the tips above, you can begin your healing journey and find a way to cope with their loss. Everyone heals on their own timeline, and I hope that on this #GivingTuesday you are able to find some way to honor your pet!
With love,
Britt
